why i love the cod cont'd.

pick a coffee cup:


pick a book:


water the flowers:


pick a chair


head to the beach:


do some shellin' at low tide:


build a beach fire:


and the end:

closing time

while this has been the summer of cheever, it has also been the summer of biographies and memoirs. this was a gift from my dear v.
i've always enjoyed queenan's essays for their brutal and somewhat unreliable prose. but after finishing this book, i may not read anything by him again without a healthy dose of cynicism. while the writers of memoirs re: cruel and alcoholic parents have been part of my personal pantheon for years, i just can't admit queenan into this lauded circle. he writes much like a petulant child, angry at some points then whimsical at others. his vitriol for his parents (and deservedly so for his father) seems to wax nostalgic when it suits him. it also reads like several essays grouped together; he repeats stories, anecdotes and moments, sometimes living differently in another chapter.
his anger is palpable. and rightfully so. but i guess after reading this book, i was left thinking, why did you write this?

the cod

packing my bags...here i come!

the perfect steak

via Brooklyn Based. i've always had an issue with meats. cooking them, i mean. i do have my grandmother's awesome cast iron skillet and sometimes my steaks are perfection, other times it's like i've cooked my shoe. i thought these were some handy and straightforward tips from brooklyn's most famous butcher, tom mylan. i totally agree about the fat. i would put butter on butter:


Butcher Tom Mylan completed his long tenure at Marlow & Daughters/Sons/Diner this Saturday. He’s on to the next episode, but thanks to our special access (Tom and our Senior Editor, Annaliese Griffin, will marry this fall!), you’ll find his meat wisdom here at Brooklyn Based in our occasional new series, Ask the Butcher. Email us with questions for future columns.

Dear Tom,
I love steak, but I never seem to cook it as competently as they do in a restaurant. My current method involves searing it on both sides and then putting it in the oven for about five minutes. The problem is in the searing. I can never get it crispy (is that even the right word?) on the outside, while keeping it nice and bloody in the middle. I can’t even get the crispy outside when I cook it that way thoroughly. Can you please describe the right way to cook a nice piece of steak rare? Also, what cut should I be buying?–Judy M.

Judy, it’s complicated. Variables like: how thick your steak is, what kind of pan you use and even how good (or bad) your stove are end up huge factors in cooking a delicious steak at home. That said, I’ll make as simple as possible for you:

Step one: Buy good meat. Pay a little more and get properly raised and well hung (dry aged) beef from mature animals (over 25 months old). The cut is not as important as the quality of the meat but you can tailor the cut to your desires. If you like more fat, buy a rib steak. If you like a lean and beefy cut, get a flat iron. Feeding a lot of people? Get a porterhouse.

Step two: Treat it right. When you get your steak home take it out of the package and let it be free. Salt and pepper it liberally and let it sit out for an hour or so before you think of cooking it. This will insure that the steak is warm and thus will cook evenly and not be overdone one the outside while staying cold in the middle. Last thing is to pat the steak with a paper towel to remove the moisture. A wet steak steams instead of fries when you put it in a pan. The number one key to a good crust on the outside is a dry steak.

Step three: Cooking, well done. Before you start, get your skillet very hot to help set up the beginnings of a sear. Cast iron works best for cheapest. Skip the raised grill pans unless it really important to you to get grill lines on your steaks, otherwise you’re just missing out on flavorful crust. Right before you throw your steak in the pan, toss in a few tablespoons each of butter and olive oil. This is a key to a pan steak on a New York City apartment oven: you don’t fry a steak you frrrry a steak. Using lots of cooking fat is key to that great crispy outside but without it seeming dry and weird. Fat tastes good. Use lots of fat. Lastly, you can skip the oven finish unless the steak is thicker than, say, 1 1/4 inches. Test for doneness by feel (Google it) or by sticking the steak with a paring knife and holding it to your bottom lip. If the knife is lukewarm pull the steak and let it rest for 5-10 minutes. The result (with a bit of practice) will be a perfectly cooked medium rare steak.

i think this is kind of cool...

i wish every town did this.
hat tip: wc. otherwise known as godihateyourband and rrthur?

WTF?

very funny and interesting bit. truly, truly incoherent.

here is a gem that is truly hilarious, via gawker.com:
"In the winter time it's the frozen road that is competing with the view of ice fogged frigid beauty, the cold though, doesn't it split the Cheechakos from the Sourdoughs?"

Gawker's critique: "It's like Peggy Noonan, Jack London, and William Faulkner wandered into the woods with three buttons of peyote and one typewriter, and only this speech emerged."

awkward teenage photo #1

suck it criss angel. that's david m.f. copperfield. and his popped collar. and a fern.

my new favorite summer cocktail

two parts cherry lemonade (recipe to follow)
one parts hendricks gin
one parts lemon/lime seltzer
over ice.
yum.


Cherry Lemonade

- makes 2 quarts of lemonade -
Ingredients

1 1/4 cups water
3/4 cup sugar
1 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice (about 6 large lemons)
6 cups cold water
1/2 pound cherries, pitted and halved
Procedure

1. Bring 1 1/4 cups water to a boil in a small pan. Once boiling, turn off heat, and stir in sugar until dissolved.

2. Combine sugar mixture, lemon juice, and 6 cups cold water in a pitcher. Add cherries and let sit in refrigerator for a few hours, until chilled.

3. Stir and serve, scooping a few cherries into your drink after you pour.

fun ways to waste time

when the weather is not cooperating. some of my favorites are on the list. you decide. i especially love this one.

the memorial

i'm embarrassed to say that while i was in midtown i ducked into chevy's to watch the mj memorial service. it seemed kind of fitting to be in a grotesquely designed tourist trap to watch this spectacle. and what's not to love about a $16 dollar plate of nachos?

now, having been to my fair share of funerals (i have a well stocked closet full of black dresses), i would like to offer my critique of today's festivities.

things not to do at a funeral/memorial service:
1. you are not allowed to chew gum at your dad's funeral.
2. if you are the father of the deceased, you should take your damn hat off, asshole.
3. sunglasses are not acceptable inside darkly lit auditoriums.
4. don't fake cry. it's totally embarrassing. and you will go to hell.
5. you are not allowed to pose for pictures, red-carpet style, before the service.
6. you cannot make claims that are not true (see al sharpton's line about Live-Aid).
7. back up singers are not to be used as a substitute for the deceased's performance.
8. if you are going to go on stage and sing the lyrics to the deceased's songs, know the fucking words.

summer of cheever.

i decided after being a huge fan of john cheever's work, to read the pseudo-authorized bio by blake bailey. i've read cheever's collected short stories and his journals, provided by his family. did i need to read more? yes. i've always had a prurient interest in his life. it was gratifying and horrifying to read 800 pages about a truly tortured, vain, selfish, brilliant and, at times, cruel man. it left me thoroughly depressed. in a good way.
this is a writer that i have held in esteem since i was 13 and read my father's copy of collected stories. that big red book is one of the only books that i have taken with me in all my moves. it was heartbreaking to find that i had lost it somewhere between moves. but luckily amazon came through with a much nicer copy than my old one.
i also picked up his collected novels at the library a few weeks ago, and just finished falconer. although it contained some beautiful and hilarious passages, it felt "lite". it was written shortly after he taught at sing-sing, and i believe many of the characters and situations are loosely based on his experience there. the novel read like a self therapy session in advanced latent homosexuality. perhaps, after sobering up and taking stock in his life he felt it was time to write this.
after my disappointment, i picked up the big red book again, hoping that i was not wrong about this guy. could it have been youthful folly? did i like him just cause my dad liked him?
after re-reading the first sentence of The Enormous Radio, i knew why i loved him; this was a man who knew vitriol, knew the corrosive, knew the deep sadness and the hilarity of the american dream. and don't get me started on The Five Forty Eight, The Sutton Place Story or The Swimmer. my advice: get the big red book.

my kind of exercising

this is what i'm talking about. also, the website has some amazing footage.

awkward family photo #2

this photo was taken right before my father blew my head off with that musket.
and those were my real glasses.

my mother, my son.

this is awesome.

interview project

this reminds me of the avedon american west photos. except in color and they speak. beautiful.

"must stop leaving the house in sweatpants."

this made my day. worth the 2 minutes. click on the video.

slap shot

i've been re-watching alot of 70's films, and this one is absolutely one of my favorites for myriad reasons. here are a few:
1. filmed in my hometown.
2. i was alive when they filmed it.
3. paul frickin newman looks hotter than ever; a washed up, blue-eyed lothario, desperately trying to save his livelihood and his team's in the worst way possible.
4. the carlson brothers (well, at least 2 out of 3) who played the hanson brothers in the film. all of these guys played for the johnstown jets (the true-life hockey team that the movie was based on). the third brother was played by the real life dave hanson, originally slated to play dave "killer" carlson. i had seen all these dudes kick ass as jets players at the war memorial ice arena.
5. the war memorial shots. i grew up learning to figure skate here. i saw my first rock concert here. i watched the jets play here. i watched my hockey playing brother kick ass here. i can still smell the lingering odor of ben-gay.
6. rampant and unfettered sexual content.
7. my sister is in it as one of the skating rockette girls.(and paul newman winked at her in real life during filming.)
8. paul's awesome leather trench with fur collar.
9. the overwhelming sense of pride and shame mixed together. it's like watching any minor-minor league team go through the motions of doing their job.
10. paul frickin newman.

awkward family photo #1

this photo has everything: hillbilly pompadour, wary hydra headed cross-eyed baby and a 4 year old flashing gang signals.
and yes, i am the baby. and why am i not wearing shoes? or even socks?

my new favorite

website. just glorious. and horrifyingly painful.

television.

i realize i do not watch much tv, but tonight i turned on my mom's old big samsung and adjusted my antennae, and the feature that came on was something on nbc, called, i'm a celebrity get me out of here. i thought maybe i would Live-Blog about it.
8:05: and the end.