my aunt alice

i've been working on a play for the last month, basically creating a character based on my aunt alice. alice was my grandfather's younger sister. she lived 2 houses up from us, and about six houses down from my grandparents. my middle name is hers.
alice had more piss and vinegar than any broad i had ever met. she was also a devout spinster. she grew up in a house full of irish boys, taught school to children of miners, had a sweetheart die in the war, drank beer in a can until her mid-80's and could shoot you a look that would stop you in your tracks. she scared the shit out of me. she also had the biggest heart of anyone i knew. generous to a fault. she and my grandmother talked every night on the phone. no matter how egregious alice had been to my grandmother that day, my grandmother always spoke to her in quiet, consoling tones. i could never understand their relationship. as i became an adult, i realized, alice needed to be loved. she wanted to stand on her own two feet, live in her own house, make her own rules. but at the end of the day, literally, she just wanted to feel loved.
used to hate my middle name. but feeling more and more like alice every day.

commitment

for the first time ever i bought a six pack roll of toilet paper. it was such a huge commitment. but i am living now in a society where you actually put your groceries in your car.
totally new. weird. baby steps.

gene wilder

just watched an interview with gene wilder, interviewed by alec baldwin. rarely have i been so rapt by every word of an interviewee. such an amazing genius. humble, hilarious and sincere. a trained actor, who got his start by watching lee cobb in death of a salesman.
he told the story about his entrance in willy wonka. said, "i must have a limp and a cane. then it gets stuck. then i realize it's stuck, keep walking, then i do a summersalt and land perfectly. it will show the audience that they can't trust me. i won't do the film if i can't have that bit."
a truly amazing genius that we so rarely hear from anymore.
i have been an early fan of wilder's since the producers. watched it as a kid and actually had the 8 track that we would listen to as kids over and over again. knew the soundtrack before ever seeing the movie.
loved it as a child. loved it even more when in college i sat with my new boyfriend who had never seen it. when "my blanket!!!" scene started, and aforementioned boyfriend was hysterically snorting, i knew he was a keeper. at least for another year.
if you don't love gene wilder, you don't love me.
gotta go. now the producers is on.

binge cooking.

i came home(?) from rehearsal today, after learning that an actor (i use that term loosely) was fired. it wasn't a surprise, yet it still left a bad taste in my mouth. so i went to the grocery store and bought 100 bucks worth of food.
made a lavish dinner of pork tenderloins, couscous with toasted almonds, sauteed brussel sprouts, and a mixed green salad with homemade blue cheese vinaigrette.
then i looked at it all and couldn't stomach it.
i had a luna bar.

starz sighting

someone took the time to put the constellation in glow in the dark stars on the bedroom ceiling of my little short term housing apt.
i didn't see them until last night.
i thought that was nice. so i decided to add gum on the bottom of the coffee table. maybe the archipelago islands of the azores.